It’s been a repeating stage in my life, where I find myself surrounded by unknowns, not sure WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT.
That moment when you realize just how little control you have and how much you have to trust, that God is who He says He is, that it will all be ok.
But will it?
Anxiety floods my fretful heart, pumping into my veins, filling my extremities, consuming me. Possibilities run through my head like a slideshow, each carrying with it an impossible weight of MAYBE and WHAT IF?.
I CAN’T HANDLE THOSE STATEMENTS. NOT WITH MY FRAGILE STATE.
I just want to know, I just NEED to know.
I plead with God for a crumb, a tiny morsel of something that I can lean on, that I can trust in, that I can anticipate and hold on to.
I try shaking him, offering up my hopes, my desires, my wishes in anticipation of a response, of something.
I fall apart, crumble, stumble searching for something that I can rest my weary head on, something I can hang my fears and anxieties on.
IN MY BLIND STATE I HEAR NOTHING, I SEE NOTHING.
“Lean on me, trust in me, hold on to me, hope in me, desire me, fall into me, rest in me, give me your fears, give me your anxiety. I will hold you, I will not let you fall, I will strengthen you, I will give you rest. I am here. You are not alone.”
Like honey, His words soothe my soul, quiet my fears, strengthen my fragile state.
He, the Creator, my sustainer, the one who conquered death, the one who gives life, HE.
The Lord of all is with me. He is my comfort and my strength for times such as these, when life is hard, when I feel like I’m at my end, when I know not what to do. He is,
all that I need Him to be. And He can be trusted.